Archive for the Culture Category

Once upon a time.. a Pink Leopard Slipped into a Dark, Wet Cave

Posted in Culture, Everyday, Random with tags , , , , , on March 2, 2010 by attemptedmustache

Is ‘she’ a man, woman? Does she really put grills on cats? Did she crawl up the rabbit hole and out of Wonderland?

Just when you thought Lady GaGa couldn’t get any more eccentric, illusive and quirky, guess what?! She Can.
You wanna talk trailblazing… Lady GaGa seems to me like a freight train headed straight for uncharted territory half the time, and that’s why I think she’s nifty.  Whether it is her avante-garde fashion, business savvy brain, androgynous appeal, or the manner in which she appears to be able to wield her fame and the music industry like some flame throwing bouncer at a gay bar, I just really think she’s got it going on.

In that sense it seems appropriate that not only does Lady GaGa have it going on, but she’s also trying to get us to PUT IT ON!  And I don’t mean our bras, hair extensions or gold chains; I’m talking condoms.

Yep, those rubbery plastic domes that have been the mortal nemesis of men and women alike for decades are taking a turn for the fancy thanks to GaGa; and if you’re looking to make a fashion statement in the sack, this might be your chance to bare it and wear it.

Need more info?
Lady GaGa and Jeremy Scott have designed a brand of Proper Attire condoms that seem to please the eye, and likely any man banging Paris Hilton as they certainly would blend in with just about every outfit she owns.
But, whether your a trendsetter, fashionista, diva or useless socialite, really anyone who has ever played dirty russian roulette in their own individual versions of  the sexual special olympics ought to buy a few of these… or 100.

Proceeds go to Planned Parenthood, which I think is fantastic, but like any controversial or taboo undertaking, it is probably chalked full of criticism and scrutiny from all angles. Good luck GaGa!
Either way, I think the thought is in the right place here, and I’m sure Custodial Engineers and Waste Collectors abroad will at least appreciate having something a little nicer to look at in the morning… maybe?….


Why does the British Royal Family Live So Long? Inbreeding, of course!

Posted in Culture, World with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 30, 2008 by attemptedmustache

Wow… so I guess if you think your cousin is hot, this is REALLY good news for you!

We humans have searched every part of the globe looking for that one true ‘fountain of youth’, the ‘holy grail’ that promotes eternal life, the eye cream made out of dolphin uterus’ that just won’t let us die. Like Indiana Jones in the Last Crusade, or Posh Spice from outer space (that’s not really fair, everyone knows Posh Spice is an earthly mutant–Long Live Scientology!) longevity seems better than any prize, it means outliving our worst enemies; whether that be the Nazis or Paris Hilton, that’s totally up to you.

But surprise surprise, little did we know, the ticket to eternal youth was right within our reach all along; maybe even in our own HOME!!

What is it?!

Our gene pool, of course!

Yep, start throwing away those prophylactics and start getting cozy with your hot cousin, cuz according to ‘New Scientist’, Giuseppe Passarino of the University of Calabria in Rende Italy says incest is AWESOME!
I mean, leave it to the Italians to think up a way to regularize totally unconventional sexual behaviors, they’ve got a LONG history that needs representing. REPRESENT!
And I guess if you’re living in the southern United States or a Mormon polygamist compound, you better start saying a prayer in thanks to these witty wop geniuses.
-Wow, this has officially become my most politically incorrect blog post yet!


Giuseppe Passarino stated: “Everyone knows inbreeding is bad – it increases your chances of catching a range of diseases. But on the other hand our study suggests if inbreds don’t get those diseases when they’re young they might have a better chance of long life.” HEZZAH to the human zygote!!

“Passarino and his colleagues used census data to identify a geographically isolated region of southern Italy with more than its fair share of male nonagerians (People in their 90s). When the team looked at the local phone book, they found many people in the region shared the same surname, suggesting marriage between related individuals was common.”

For more details: CLICK!

So there it is, the secret to why the British Royal Family, rich aristocrats and the Osmonds live annoyingly long lives… generations and generations of inbreeding. ‘Blue Blood‘–>Incest

I’ve got one question though, has anyone ever done a study on what inbreeding does to your teeth?

Attack of the Biblots! Part Two

Posted in Culture with tags , , , , , , on January 30, 2008 by attemptedmustache

As some of you might recall, I wrote a post a couple days ago regarding Christian terrorist Shirley Phelps-Roper and the Westboro Baptist Church. While I was surfing the net today I found a surprising interview between Shirley and a wellknown YouTube enthusiast ‘TheAmazingAtheist’. And just like his name suggests, TheAmazingAtheist likely subscribes to the same sort of deductions about all things Religion as Cartman does in this photograph:

While I’m tempted to agree with Shirley in that I’m not sure what is so ‘amazing’ about this guy, I actually really appreciated this interview.
The ‘Amazing Atheist’ really brings up what I believe is a fundamental point about Christianity, that being: ‘Who ARE the ‘True’ Christians?’

According to the Amazing Atheist, if all Christians were to undergo a stringent, thorough, active reading of the Bible, they would likely adhere to the same belief-set that Shirley Phelps-Roper so adamantly, and often inexcusably projects to the American Public.

I don’t know enough about the Bible or Christianity to really say that I agree with anything that is said in this interview, but I think that it is an interesting spin on all the hype surrounding the members of the Westboro Baptist Church, and their spokesperson, Shirley Phelps-Roper. I also really appreciate how he actually gives the woman a chance to speak. Surprisingly, she actually makes a lot of solid points that could likely leave the most devoted Christian speechless.
Do I agree with what she says or the way she conducts herself? NO!! Absolutely not! I think she gives all good Christians, and good people the world round a bad name.

However, I am posting this video, as I think it sheds a lot more light on why these people are so forceful about their crusade against homosexuals, ‘wrong-thinking’ Christians, and the general American Public.

Lastly, omit the lame opening montage part of this video, it’s embarrassing, and when the interview concludes and the AmazingAtheist (aka: douchebag) begins his own rant, it is best to close the window at that point as well. He drops the f-bomb about 20 times (totally brilliant…not!), and not only makes himself look like a complete and utter fool, but totally discredits himself by acting so ignorantly. Up until “Final Thoughts”, it’s all good.

View with an open mind:

Should their be Etiquette to the Internet?

Posted in Culture, Media with tags , , , , , , , , on January 29, 2008 by attemptedmustache

How many times have you heard some one mention how Facebook is ruining our lives?
I’ve heard it plenty, and I’m telling you, I disagree… but I am definitely weary of the internet on some general level.
Not only have I noticed that my attention span seems shorter, but I’ve also noticed how communicating through the internet has certainly caused some significant problems in some of my real-life relationships.

Maybe its the way the medium DOES allow us all to act on impulse; maybe it has something to do with the way we can so easily misinterpret the message we are receiving, or conceal the message we’re ACTUALLY sending… whatever the cause, there is definitely a problem.

Have any of you ever gotten into a petty fight with a significant other, or a close friend, and as a punishment, childishly deleted them on Facebook, or MSN Messenger, or Gtalk? I know I have…hah… it’s one of those things you regret instantly…then what follows is that familiar, sick, cramping feeling that enters into your stomach, then all your limbs, and you curse yourself until the moment the stupid action is resolved.

Have any of you ever been more inclined to deal with serious problems through internet communication than face-to-face interaction? I certainly have… and I know it’s definitely caused it’s share of problems as well. There are definitely some people that will become seriously offended when you use email, or instant messaging to blanket statements or mediate between yourself and others.

So here is my predicament: The internet seems to allow us to act in certain ways, say certain things we might not normally say, sarcastically take a stab at people that annoy us while including a 🙂 that somehow makes that okay; we can delete our friends, delete the messages they post on our wall, we can casually not respond to emails, we can forward incriminating photos of our friends or post them on Facebook… the list of indiscretions goes on and on.
Now I don’t think the Internet is an evil by any means, but I think the way that we use it can definitely contribute to the implications of others that suggest that it IS a serious evil in the world.
Sometimes I wish that there wasn’t this different set of prescribed rules to the Internet that allowed us to interact with each other in such a casual, terse, inattentive, sometimes hurtful way. I wish that I wasn’t guilty of this myself.

Perhaps the way we use the internet needs to be reconsidered, perhaps there needs to be more of a human type of etiquette to internet communication… but would that take away all the unique pleasure that the internet presently affords us?
I couldn’t tell you… all I know is that the amount of time I spend every day staring into computer screens, televisions screens, phone screens, door screens, etc, really might indicate that either I need to get out more, or that these sorts of things are entirely taking over my life.

To be continued…