Why does the British Royal Family Live So Long? Inbreeding, of course!

Wow… so I guess if you think your cousin is hot, this is REALLY good news for you!

We humans have searched every part of the globe looking for that one true ‘fountain of youth’, the ‘holy grail’ that promotes eternal life, the eye cream made out of dolphin uterus’ that just won’t let us die. Like Indiana Jones in the Last Crusade, or Posh Spice from outer space (that’s not really fair, everyone knows Posh Spice is an earthly mutant–Long Live Scientology!) longevity seems better than any prize, it means outliving our worst enemies; whether that be the Nazis or Paris Hilton, that’s totally up to you.

But surprise surprise, little did we know, the ticket to eternal youth was right within our reach all along; maybe even in our own HOME!!

What is it?!

Our gene pool, of course!

Yep, start throwing away those prophylactics and start getting cozy with your hot cousin, cuz according to ‘New Scientist’, Giuseppe Passarino of the University of Calabria in Rende Italy says incest is AWESOME!
I mean, leave it to the Italians to think up a way to regularize totally unconventional sexual behaviors, they’ve got a LONG history that needs representing. REPRESENT!
And I guess if you’re living in the southern United States or a Mormon polygamist compound, you better start saying a prayer in thanks to these witty wop geniuses.
-Wow, this has officially become my most politically incorrect blog post yet!


Giuseppe Passarino stated: “Everyone knows inbreeding is bad – it increases your chances of catching a range of diseases. But on the other hand our study suggests if inbreds don’t get those diseases when they’re young they might have a better chance of long life.” HEZZAH to the human zygote!!

“Passarino and his colleagues used census data to identify a geographically isolated region of southern Italy with more than its fair share of male nonagerians (People in their 90s). When the team looked at the local phone book, they found many people in the region shared the same surname, suggesting marriage between related individuals was common.”

For more details: CLICK!

So there it is, the secret to why the British Royal Family, rich aristocrats and the Osmonds live annoyingly long lives… generations and generations of inbreeding. ‘Blue Blood‘–>Incest

I’ve got one question though, has anyone ever done a study on what inbreeding does to your teeth?


3 Responses to “Why does the British Royal Family Live So Long? Inbreeding, of course!”

  1. Dele Martinet Says:

    yes, its worth reading and knowing but i desire more information especially on individuals in the lineage about the type of diseases also common with them.

  2. Yeah they are inbred bastards TIOCFAIDH AR LA !!

  3. I’m gald that royalty doesn’t inbreed any more because it screwed up their gene pool over the course of centuries as a result they had a lot of genetic defects.

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