Blur for Blow

So I guess Rick James isn’t the only celebrity out there willing to publicly admit that cocaine is ‘one hell of a drug’.

Apparently Alex James (‘James’!! Coincidence… I think not!!), bass player for British band ‘Blur’, is expected to present an edition of ‘Panorama’ next week on the Columbian cocaine trade, according to

Yes, any human with half an inkling of a social consciousness knows that cocaine IS the rich man’s aspirin, and as a bonus it even doubles as the powdered equivalent of liquid Draino, for your nose; ‘it’s just sooo clean’.
Soooo, with this in mind, Alex James was DEFINITELY a perfect candidate for President Alvaro Uribe to invite to the country to investigate the cocaine trade. Rumor has it that Uribe simultaneously solved a magical rubik’s cube when the idea to invite James occurred to him.

But seriously, who knows cocaine and the drug trade better than celebrities? They know about as much about cocaine as I do about coffee (Columbian connection!), or at least they’ve ingested enough over the years to be crazy enough to think they do. On second thought, who knows more about anything to do with anything than celebrities? I mean, I could have thought of no BETTER suited person than Alex James to go to Columbia to investigate the drug wars, interview farmers, sellers and enforcers… not even Angelina Jolie… I have bigger plans for her, as the next Jesus, of course.

Nope, definitely couldn’t think of anyone more appropriate …

*cough* Experts in the Field *cough* Narcotics Expert *cough* Drug Trafficking Expert *cough*

Though… the jury is still out on whether or not I’d even consider Alex James a ‘celebrity’ per say; though I hear he makes a really half decent cheese… I DO like cheese.

And speaking of deviated septums, I wonder what Lindsay Lohan thinks about being overlooked for this project? Lindsay, you were MY first choice!


One Response to “Blur for Blow”

  1. […] when my concept I envision for the fantastic gang at NIN is something to do with cheese? I mean, Blur is doing it!! And seriously, who doesn’t love cheese? No! I’m serious. Who […]

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